All I Want

~ KEEP YOUR HOPES UP HIGH AND YOUR HEAD DOWN LOW ~

Once again I feel like I’m not in my place, I’m too old to do some things and too young to do others… Being a young adult totally sucks.
But anyway.
I love to write. For now, I basically write for myself and sometimes, I let my boyfriend read what I do. But let’s be honest. I HATE when he reads me. The only thing he sees in my stories is all the details that sounds weird to him. What about the essence of the story? What about the characters? What about the feelings I try to make you feel? Ok, sure, I said he was there and not here but who cares?! No, it seems to be super important for him. Changing a word, misunderstand something I tried to write pretty easily… And, even if I know I asked him to read me sometimes, that pisses me off…
I wanted to publish my stories (call them however you want, it’s not big roman or novels, it’s just some character having a life during less than 50 pages and then, they disappear) on the net, just so people can read them and also give me any kind of advice or suggestion or anything.
Long time ago, I had a few readers. It was such a big pleasure to come back home after school, do my stupid homework (with the help of Google and Wikipedia, for what it worth…) and then write another part of my story! Read all the kind comments, sometimes I had such surprises when my readers tried to guess what was coming next… I loved that! But I finished high school, went to university and just lost the time to maintain them. I continued to write but only for myself. then I stopped writing. Why would I continue if none was there to read…
But writing a drug for me. I couldn’t stop! I had to write again, to put all my ideas, feelings and visions on the paper. Yes, I sometimes still use a pen and a sheet of paper…
So, today, I’m working on something I began in February 2007. It’s a story in three little parts. I’ve already two parts done and complete. I’m now working on the third and it’s going pretty well! I like what I did, so far. Hopefully, I’ll find anything to do with this three-parts-story…
Stocked by my new story, I was like “well I can try to publish the other two parts to see what people think and then publish the third to see if they find that everything is good”. Oh my god, I never thought I would have so many difficulties to find a place where to build my new reader base… I actually don’t even know for who my stories are written: kids, teenagers, adults? I don’t know…
I think I’m just going to finish my last part of the story and then see what to do. I even thought about translate it… It’s actually written in French, my native tongue. Maybe I’d translate them, but I’ll need some help…
Anyway. It was just a midnight random thought.

Cheers, Lady of Flesh

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One thought on “All I Want

  1. If you need some help for the translation maybe I can ^^
    I’m happy to see that you start again writing ! You seemed to feel so bad without it… :s Happy for you ^^

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