A call to the world… Help me keep believing

I’m thinking about what happened yesterday. I thought about it all day long. I didn’t sleep that much. I feel so lost… I don’t know what to do…

I can’t believe some people agreed with how the police beat us and send our friend to the hospital. I can’t believe people are still believing in that police who’s supposed to protect us from the fascists and extremists. They fucking beat young ant-fascits students because we were just there to say no to ALL the extremists. I mean, how people can allow them to beat their children when we, the children, are trying to awake the fucking world?! How is it just fucking imaginable?!

I heard that the police could complain against all of us for rebellion. We can have from fines to convictions. And this is the usual method that cops use now to turn a victim of police’s violence into guilty of rebellion. I think the cops are over using their power and this is no more their job they’re doing. This is pure repression and violence for the elite.

I’m going to tell you what I did today. I went to the city center of Brussels for some shopping with my sister. First thing, I refused to take any underground public transports. So we stayed outside. Second thing, whenever I saw cops or police cars or heard them, my heart started to beat very quickly and my eyes were looking everywhere to find them. I felt so insecure! I was scared to find those cops behind me trying to get me one more time. I didn’t enjoy my time there. Worst: my sister had to take my fucking hand because she felt me in distress and she tried to calm me down. It works a bit but now, I don’t want to go out unless it’s really necessary.

I’m hopeless now. I feel like the cops are going to win one more time and just have everything for them while we’re all going to feel that anger growing in us. I feel  like I’m so fucked and maybe, this whole “revolution” thing is just a lie, a fucking toy the 1% of this world made to let us play with as they keep sucking our blood, sweat, tears and money out of us. I feel like my energy is already empty and none in this world really wants to move and change stuff.

I’m hopeless. So hopeless.

I’d like to ask for help but who can help us? Who can help me? My faith in this world exploded yesterday in jail. Everything I saw and heard made me feel bad, worst than what I expected. And the very worst of all is that I don’t know who/what can help me.

Maybe the Anon family could but there’re way much more interesting and useful actions to take that I won’t ask them. The “usual” way of nongovernmental organizations always takes so much time.

I want the cops to know that this time, that was enough. That was the last time. And now, they have to pay. Help me. Please. Help me…

Lady of Flesh

Here are some of the pictures I took. Use them, share them.

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3 thoughts on “A call to the world… Help me keep believing

  1. I think I can understand how you feel…
    Revolution takes time. I know, it’s stupid, but nowadays, with internet and all those stuffs we’re forgetting this little truth. How many years before the “Printemps Arabe” could happen for real ? How many will the Canadien students have to stay in the streets wasting the universitary year they paid ?

    I can understand jail made you think, but don’t forsake your faith in a better world, cause if you do, they have won. Regarding what happened to you, you have the right to take a break, it’s no shame. You’re hurt, at your wrist and in your mind and faith. So yeah, take a break, and come back later, and stronger.

    Belgium is not the most stable state in Europe. In a way, in some people’s mind, and in most politic’s mind, authority like cops can maintain order and stability, and avoid the state to explode from the inside. Maybe it’s a reason why people don’t react or choose to believe in obvious manipulation… (it’s a personal hypothesis)
    But once again don’t give up your ideas.

    You love history right ? So let’s look back in time… (I’m sorry I gonna pick in French history… I’m not really good in this topic so…)
    Before WW2, when Hitler got elected, in France, NOBODY said a word. When he starts invading some other lands such as Austria, did not say a word when he signed with Russia. And when he finally invaded France, he said “you choose shame instead of war, you’ll have shame AND war.”. And when it comes to the resistance, contrary to what some French people want to believe, not every French were resistants. They were a minority, not a rule… But finally it’s because of them that things could move.

    This is a stupid exemple, I know, but I’m sure that with your knowledge you can find some others much better.
    Once again, if you don’t want to go on strike and demonstration because you’re afraid, you can. But don’t give up your ideas, never. It’s part of who you are and you can’t let them take this out of you ! I read the stuffs you share, even if I don’t react everytime. Share information is also an important part of revolutions. Don’t give up your faith.

    Take care of you…

    • Thank you so much for all your words. That’s what I needed… I really think I’m gonna avoid protestation for a while, nothing until I don’t know what the Police is going to do with us… But whenever I’d feel ready again, I’ll be in the streets to fucking show them how hurt I was. Thank you so so so so much =) ❤

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